Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Strange People Monday, Part II

The Yarn Harlot was in town last night, at Third Place Books, promoting her latest book on knitting humor, Things I Learned From Knitting (Whether I Wanted To or Not).

One of the best things about this event was the bonding going on in the room prior to Stephanie Pearl-McPhee taking the stage.  A room full of knitters, from all walks of life, gathered together chatting about yarn, patterns, books, and anything else related to the sickness of knitting.   I had the pleasure of sitting next to a nice, older woman who just raved about the yarn that I was using-the color is Bloom, dyed by Absolute Jeanius-and, the sock that I was knitting-the Monkey Sock by Cookie A.

Then, her friend arrived. 

And, Strange People Monday, Part II, began with the following conversation:

Nice, older woman to her Friend:  Look at the sock that she is knitting, isn't the yarn pretty?
Me:  Thank you, I'll let my friend know that you liked it.
Friend, nose turned up:  What'd she dye it with Kool Aid?
Me:  Uh, no, but I don't think that she would have a problem dying with Kool Aid.

Nice, older woman:  Isn't the sock pattern that she is knitting pretty?
People in the row behind us:  Oh, I love that sock pattern, and that is the cutest yarn I have ever seen!
Friend:  Yes, I guess Americans really enjoy their socks...yawn...
(Hmmm...no accent detected, not even Canadian)
Me:  Excuse the f**k out of me elitist, pretend, euro trash!  OK, so I didn't really say that, I should have, huh?

Then, Friend pulls out her knitting, and it took every fiber of my being (no pun intended) to keep from laughing because SHE WAS KNITTING WITH RED HEART!!!  I HEARD IT SQUEAK!  and...YES, MY NAME IS KAT, AND I AM A YARN SNOB!

Perhaps I am the strangest of Strange People Monday.


Well...I asked for strange people...

So, yesterday morning I got on the bus, sat down, put on the headphones, got out the knitting, and looked forward to 45 minutes of uninterrupted knit time.

Then, the fat man arrived.

And sat down next to me.

Scratch that...on me.

Now, I'm not a skinny little person, but I make sure that I only take up my half of the seat on public transportation, as most passengers do-regardless of size.  However, I have noticed an alarming trend amongst large, commuting men.  They seem to think that it's perfectly acceptable to let their arms flop around IN MY SPACE.  And, they think it's cute when they fall asleep and let their oversized jowls flap around like sails-in-a-freak-storm-brewing-over-the-Pacific (OK, so flapping jowls usually produces spattering spittle, somewhat like an ocean mist, only not pleasant-thus, the comparison).

It's time to stop this unwarranted occupation.  I say it's time to start a revolution, so grab your unused size 5 Susan Bates DPNs and start stabbing these evil doers.  Each little flap gets a little stab.  We don't need to draw blood, just cause pain...and, TAKE BACK OUR SIDE OF THE SEAT ON PUBLIC TRANSPORTATION.

Saturday, April 19, 2008

No Strange People...

Well, I was going to start writing about the "strangers" that I encounter on a daily basis, but everyone was so normal this week.  I don't understand this non-strange phenomenon, why are my muses behaving this way? 

Therefore, I am just going to post a comparison between last Saturday, and today.  

Last Saturday:  Sunny and 77 degrees!  I wore my favorite (ancient) Tevas without socks!  Went to waterfront with handsome spouse, read, slept, relaxed...sigh, perfect day.

Today:  Snow?  WTF?  However, this Saturday was just as perfect as last.  Snow, hail, sunshine (again, WTF?), two new-to-me yarn shops in Seattle, Peets, hummus, and the company of L&O (stage names coming soon).  Only thing missing was spouse :(. 

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

First Post

Okay, so everyone on Ravelry has their own clever little blogs...everyone, that is, except me. The problem I have is that I'm not much of a writer, I can be clever, but my cleverness is usually limited to my bitter sarcasm, and I'm not quite sure how to make this trait evident in writing. Bitter sarcasm is usually best when experienced in person as it's all in the look and the tone.

I also don't really have that much of a life.  I consider myself to be quite dull; no real drama to speak of, just an average existence.  Don't get me wrong, I prefer no drama and I'm happy and content most of the time (except when it comes to work, but that's another story).   I have a sweet, somewhat sappy, but incredibly intelligent and gifted spouse.  He's very creative and artistic.   I have three rotten cats and a fish.  I have a few hobbies, and an addiction called knitting (also, another story.)  

So, I've decided to post blogs regarding more interesting subjects-the people that I observe daily...on the bus, or while shopping, or wherever and whenever someone strikes me as annoying, strange, sad, etc.  In my blog, you'll be introduced to Chihuahua Woman, Annoying Umbrella People, Mr. Please Stop Picking Your Nose on Public Transportation, and a whole cast of characters which expands daily.

I think I'll start with Annoying Umbrella People in a few days...so stay tuned...